To F

After a very good day today, I decided to open my lappie to check mails and other stuff. I have no idea that I am in for a big surprise. I will surely blog tonight. But the content I had in my mind was all about the realizations I had in this Sunday's sermon by our Parish priest. But things turned upside down.

Friendster is the last social networking site that I usually open. Out of missing the adorable kids, I clicked on their account. I was stunned to see that Ate Cha and I no longer have a common friend. I can't believe it with my very eyes. I refreshed the site again. Voila! He already deleted me. I froze in disbelief. Then the hurt feeling hit me. How could he do that to me? Does he hate me that much?

For the first time, I can now say that I abhor him. I hate him so much. It pains me to feel this. I thought that I have already moved on but this development still affected me. More than the PSP and DSLR confession, tonight's discovery caused me so much pain and hatred that I want to tear every piece of memory that I saved.

I can't help but cry. Pour all the emotions that I kept for so long. Until the very end, I tried to save everything that I can. I did my best in that relationship. I just don't feel that I deserved all these. Even after the falling out, I remained to be nice with F. I refrained myself from having any verbal tussle with him.

To F, you are so unfair. I hate you from my very bones. I just wish that someone will love you again despite your bearing. You are such a loser. Deleting me in your FS will not delete the fact that I made you happy. You are at your happiest when we were together. Wala ng magmamahal sayo the way I did.